As the editor of a wine blog, my inbox runneth over with Valentine-themed wine pitches. It’s like celebrating V-Day in my grammar school, when egalitarianism mandated every student give every other student a Valentine (and the teacher too if you were feeling kiss-assy). Unless you were Charlie Brown, your desk ended up looking like a recycle bin of G-rated aphorisms.

Wine press releases, however, are not so succinct, and like a Gumpian box of chocolates, you never know what you’ll get. But one release was so chockablock with delicious detail that it read like a Valentine to one’s taste buds. Below is some copypasta regarding the Valentine’s Day Dinner at Kendall-Jackson Wine Estate & Gardens, with slight editorial embellishments.

A reception precedes the dinner and features killer apps like Hog Island oysters, blini and trout caviar, crab cakes, and butternut squash soup. The experience is well-paired with KJ’s 2015 Kendall-Jackson Grand Reserve chardonnay. But this is just foodie foreplay…

Dinner begins with a lobster salad with avocado, fennel, and Meyer lemon, paired with the 2014 Jackson Estate Santa Maria Valley, chardonnay. Because, f— your Salade niçoise with its pathetic little anchovies! We have lobster, baby! This is followed by a red wine risotto with truffle, thyme, and parmesan, paired with the 2013 Jackson Estate Outland Ridge, pinot noir, which reminds that this dinner is ISO a LTR with your belly.

Next comes the Beef Wellington (a name that hardly captures the decadence of a filet of steak, coated with pâté and duxelles, wrapped in puff pastry) coupled with creamed greens and sunchoke, and paired with the 2013 Jackson Estate Alexander Valley, cabernet sauvignon. And, yes, it wants to be inside you.

Not yet convinced of this meal’s ardor? Next is a raspberry sorbet with dark chocolate mousse, dehydrated mousse, and raspberry caramel (complemented by the Grand Reserve Port, Russian River Valley). But wait, there’s more… Mignardises! Pronounced min-yar-DEEZ, these are tiny, post-dessert pastries and sweets that are essentially dessert for your dessert because once is never enough.

Takeaways: Kendall-Jackson Sends a Valentine to Yo Tummy

The feast begins at 6 p.m., Tuesday, February 14, at Kendall-Jackson Wine Estate & Gardens, 5007 Fulton Rd., Fulton, CA. $125 per person (or $100 per club member); limit two reservations. (800) 769-3649.

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